Summary

As is my typical in most things, I hate drafts so delivered something quite far along for my prior submission on my critical review. A weird form of perfectionism, perhaps? Perhaps masochism.

My tutor suggested seeking some additional context from writers such as Amelia Jones, and provided the following guides:

• Seeing Differently A History and Theory of Identification and the Visual Arts (2012)
• Self/Image: Technology, Representation, and the Contemporary Subject (2006)

Given space considerations and time, I can’t fold those in but as my tutor notes: this critical review could serve as a launching off point for further research and exploration. I agree, and will chase down these sources to add to my continued reading.

It is somewhat funny (perhaps only to me) that a year ago I couldn’t have seen myself reading through texts such as this. Honestly, my job has flensed the joy of reading from me so it was a welcome surprise to get back into it — I’ve even willingly continued reading works by bell hooks outside of the needs of this particular review. Will wonders never cease?

In some part, I think I was able to approach the work successfully(?) because of how I spread it out over the entire unit. I began my ideation, and reading back in March and have been noodling away in the back of my mind ever since.

Anyway, to point: I have made a few changes in wording since the draft sent to my tutor. Not really in content, but in softening the ‘voice’. I found, in re-(re-re-re-)reading, that I had adopted a very technical phrasing that felt unnatural to me now. I’ve fixed a few of these, here and there. But couldn’t see much I could do to materially affect what I wanted to present.

My greatest challenge is conciseness, and I find myself at the absolute limit of the wordcount. Natural and perhaps an indication my tutor is right: this should be a longer work. It may well be in the future as they are topics of interest to me.

Self Evaluation

Nothing coherent at the moment, but I have time to draft before the assessment. I think my journey this year has been one of confidence (though I think I’ve said that in every self-evaluation, across every unit so far).

There is definitely a through line in my work that I’m willing to push myself out of comfort zone to try a few things, but am gravitationally bound to figuration and realism. The AI abstraction explorations were a fascinating combination of fun and extreme frustration and likely will fall away from my practice (at least in their current form). I did like the results, for the most part, but not the “how”. Perhaps there is a different avenue towards the same end, that can be articulated without the painful broken AI process. Perhaps that defeats the point, however?

Developing the portrait of PJ (“A Gentleman’s Progress”) was the start of a project I’ve wanted to do for a couple years, but lacked the confidence. Working directly with models, figuring out locations, legals, expectations, but also a project around the intersections of individual identity. I have a lot on my plate right now — especially on realizing the other project (still called ‘Spent’ but I’m increasingly dissatisfied with that working title) — but I’m considering who might be the next portrait in the series. perhaps I’ll put it out on my socials to see who might raise their hand? No, that feels too arbitrary. I want it to be considered.

The workshop in Italy was a step up from my prior online work. Yes, the online bookcamps, mentorships, etc were very valuable. But the in-person workshop was something else. So I’m off to Rome next summer for a repeat x2 (two week workshop). Looking forward to it already, and beginning to enumerate the things I want to improve on (impasto remains beyond my grasp… as silly as that may seem to articulate)

Portfolio

I had wanted to get more works in the Spent project through, so there was a coherent body of work to present into assessment. Not that I’m lacking works that meet my bar, but coherency would have been nice. Potential ones that jump out at me are below. The early works might serve as example of where I’ve improved upon?

Putting all the works out like this makes me ask if they were all done by the same hand? Such different results one each. Typical. But I can read the “raising the bar” I was applying myself, in their progression.

I debate the costume work and whether it bears inclusion. I didn’t finish it, as a prior tutor suggested I might not. The whims of my brain and the pressures of time management. I greatly enjoyed it, and I made such a drama of it all at the beginning of the unit, only to test the waters and walk in a different direction. Pity. I can still see something of a performance in my mind.